Misunderstanding, Maybe?

You know when you hear a song …and it gets stuck in your head and you’re happily singing along to it all day, loudly? Then someone points out that you’re singing the wrong words…bit embarrassing innit? But isn’t it brilliant when you get tocatch out people who don’t know the words to a song at a bar or gig – and they just sort of mime random things instead of just shutting up – because somehow mimeing nonsense makes it a lot less embarrassing than not knowing  the words at all.

I even do it when i’m listening to my Mp3 player – no one else even knows what i’m listening to, but if  i don’t know the words to a verse in a song, i’ll sing a verse i do know instead… Just incase someone, somewhere, is watching…

Weird thoughts start going through my head though, like “what if that guy opposite me is deaf, and can lip read? He’ll know i fucked up the chorus. Is he smiling? Is that a smile, or wind? I bet it’s a smile. That smug bastard…i hope he misses his stop.”

I know man, I’ve got issues.  I’ve got issues like you wouldn’t believe. I don’t even think deaf people know the lyrics to songs…i always figured they were more into Drum and Bass…

In fact I don’t mind admitting to you that i’m actually so petrified of people finding out that i don’t know the words to songs that  I once took the album sleeve from a Greenday CD to a  gig because i didn’t want to look stupid. Yep, that’s me. I did that. I’m that ridiculous. Hindsight is a terrible thing.  I looked like someone from the Songs of Praise audience that had stumbled into the wrong arena.

I wish I had just an inch of cool about me, i really really do. Alas, i’m destined to bumble through life being painfully below average, with feet that look like plasticine hands.

Anyway…ive completely forgotten why i’m writing this…

OH YEAH! Right, you know the song ‘Maps’ by Yeah Yeah Yeahs. Amazing, is it not? It’s also quite possibly one of my favourite songs. Well, i was listening to it today and even though i know that Karen O is singing “Wait…They don’t love you like i love you.”

I still sometimes get convinced that she’s actually saying “Wayne…They don’t love you like i love you.”

(on a side note – isn’t Wayne just a horrible horrible name? All ‘Waynes’ seem to wear track suits like they’re actually a second skin and appear to be trained in petty crime from birth)

So, I looked it up on google. One of those A-Z lyric sites, to put my mind at rest. Plus, i didn’t want to give the smug deaf bloke on the bus any more ammunition than he already had.

The thing that intrigued me about the site, was that under where the lyrics are printed there is an optional comment box which prompts people to share why they love the song. I read a few comments.  I don’t know why – because a little part of me genuinely dies every time i read what the monosyllabic illiterate tards comment on YouTube. I’m just a nosey git i guess, and reading about peoples opinions on these sort of things is sort of like snooping in their diaries – or slyly listening to a therapy session through an air vent.

Anyway, It was all very generic and predictable…although a few amused me when they probably shouldn’t have. They were baring their souls after all – and i was laughing a hearty satisfied laugh…

• “Wow, I really like this song so much. It’s so pretty and touching. But I feel bad 4 Karen O because she is actually crying in the music video. Those are real tears because something happened between her and her boyfriend and then she got like, all sad and stuff.In the video, her facial expression is really strange.It’s like all paranoid and shocked and scared.She also looks kind of messed up. She is really pretty though.The drummer is so awesome in the video. I have also wanted to play the drums and everybody says my rythym is really good so he inspired me.This is my ABSOLUTE FAVORITE song and its so beautiful and i just can’t find the words for it its so pretty. I’m 12 by the way.”

I like how she assumes that we would be so blinded by the indepth intellectual analysis of the song, that we would never believe a 12 year old could produce such thought provoking words. To be honest, i was on to her from “she got like, all sad and stuff.” Besides that, her username was “I believe in fairies. I’m 12″. Stating your age that many times only makes me think that there is a possibility that you are a Groomer. And if you are, then I kind of hope your arms fall off as a punishment. Because then you wouldn’t be able to achieve your ‘dream’ of becoming a world class drummer. Or type. Or whatever godawful business you get up to with those arms. But, if you are just a 12 year old girl – then i’m sorry. I hope you keep your arms for at least another 10 years. Unless i read a comment from you on YouTube… then i hope they fall off instantly. As soon as you finish typing ‘LMFAO’. Which in this case, would stand for ‘Laughing My Fucking Arms Off’. Obviously.

• “Ok, it goes like this. There is this girl @ our school. She goes out with this dude. He is a real douche but apparrently she only goes out with him for his appearance “but he works out and that’s sexy” and I haven’t told her that I want to go out with her but if I did that douche of a bf would get like extremely pissed.”

Well, that’s just the cock calling the prick a knob. Surely?

• “An emptiness. An almighty void. “Wait! They don’t love you like I love You” Its amazing how much emotion that line has.
  A song about all us losers who love and are not loved. Who’ve missed the bus of life and are reminded of it every day.”

Whoa. Thanks for that. Umm, if you need me…i’ll be in the garage. In the car. With the engine running. Waiting patiently for the sweet release of death…

It was quite the roller coaster of emotion to be honest. People falling in love, people falling out of love…and then there was this guy:

“The world ended in june when the only girl i really loved since the day i met her 6 long long years ago -  accidentally caused the death of my little long eared hoppin friend Smores. I was changed forever.”

Umm. I don’t want to be rude – i mean hey, the song is open to interpretation. But…i can’t help but think that maybe he’s completely missed the mark here. In fact, the mark is barely even a dot to him. Then again, maybe i am wrong? Maybe me,the 12 year old (and the douchebag)  have been complete and utter fools and Karen O is actually singing about the tragic death of her pet Chinchilla.

Although, i very much doubt it.

But if listening to this song reminds you of your beloved rabbit, who from what i gather was an unfortunate victim of manslaughter,then hey – whatever gets you through the day. It could be worse…you could be a douche.

Silver linings and all…

Apparently he’s not alone though:

“I’m really sorry about your rabbit.. i lost my hamster this year in similar circumstances.. so sad “

Who knew it was so common, huh?

I must admit, i quite like the idea of a Viking Burial for a hamster with ‘Maps’ softly playing in the backgound…

Sorry i just really felt the need to share that with you.

They really don’t love you like i love you xx